Photo Montage

Years ago, I gave up on posed, professional Christmas pictures of the Heathens.  While some families can make that work, our Zoo is not one of them.  Occasionally we have managed a good one.  However, they rarely capture what are truly my Heathens' personalities.

I changed to using snapshots of them several years ago.  Not only is it more fun, but I get laughs and "I LOVED your Christmas card photo" instead of "they looked so nice."

This year, I started to run out of time and realized I still had not sent out Christmas cards.  Which meant loading the Heathens into a car, driving to a local location that was "Heathenish" to me, unloading Heathens, and giving instructions.

My instructions were: Go stand on that rock and do something.

Here's what I got in response:

 Amazingly, no one ended up in the water or actually got pushed off the rock.  No one was hurt and there was neither tears nor blood - TOTAL SUCCESS!

Although it didn't make the card, this last one is my favorite.  Not only are they all together, but they are STILL (not a common occurrence!).

Merry Christmas from the Zoo.  We hope your holidays are everything you want them to be.

Rogue Sheep & Grumpy Angels

Christmas nativity plays are one of my FAVORITE parts of Christmas.  I've heard people groan about it being the "same story" every year (of COURSE it is - so is Fiddler On The Roof!).  But every group does it a little differently, and I love watching the children age up through the roles.

Many, many years ago, Heathen #1 was a sheep.  His first year in the nativity play, Heathen #2 was too small to participate and Heathen #3 didn't even exist!  And I remember being mortified when MY SHEEP was the one that wouldn't stand where he was supposed to stand.  He was quiet (a small blessing, I thought at the time), but he meandered around the sanctuary and inspected decorations.  When it was time to walk to the front with the other children, he flatly refused.  During the song he was to sing with the other children, his lips were clenched tightly closed.

Ready to cry in my pew as I juggled a very small Heathen #2, all I wanted to do was snatch up my older child and run from the building.  But as I glanced around for the glares I knew I was receiving, I was shocked to see people giggling and pointing and smiling.

No one in that sanctuary cared about Heathen #1's misbehavior - except the Asst. Zookeeper and me.

I remember the following year being a little better and Heathen #1 a bit more cooperative.  Then Heathen #2 was old enough to be a sheep and Heathen #1 graduated to shepherd - I spent most of that year threatening Heathen #1 what I was going to do if he hooked his brother around the neck with his shepherd's crook one more time.  Turned out, that shepherd's crook was the only reason Heathen #2 didn't wander about.  And the congregation smiled and pointed.

The year that the older two Heathens were BOTH shepherds was the year of the battle of the shepherds' crooks - no injuries to report!  We used plastic, hollow crooks which couldn't do much damage.  Despite the Star Wars light-saber type battle in the background of the nativity scene - the congregation was still smiling and pointing.  And telling me at the end of service about how much they loved the "spunk" in my Heathens.

Heathen #3 made his own debut as a sheep and a shepherd when he was old enough.  I had a bit better behavior from the Heathens at that point because I was running the play for several years and could provide "momma looks" when needed during practice.  But, there were the typical small Heathen antics from that child as well.

As the Heathens have aged through the roles of sheep, shepherd, the wise men, the angel Gabriel, and Joseph, and finally to narrator and stage crew, the Heathens have learned their roles - as well as the story in a way that many adults don't.

This year, the oldest two Heathens were originally on stage crew.  However, Heathen #1 was quickly placed on "rogue sheep & angel" duty - trying to keep three small children from escaping the back of the narthex in an attempt to get to the nursery that holds the toys.  By the end of the play, he was exhausted - and I was laughing!

Now as we walk into these nativity plays, we try to guess which of the children will be the rogue sheep or the grumpy angel that won't cooperate - and we look forward to seeing them.  This year, we had both!  And the Asst. Zookeeper and I were thrilled to see them - not only are they adorably cute, but they remind us of the years that it was our Heathens in those roles.

Joseph

The youngest Heathen played Joseph this year - and took his role quite seriously. He did a wonderful job.  All of the children did a wonderful job.

Speaking with the angel, Gabriel

But next Christmas, the Asst. Zookeeper and I will still be laying bets on which will be the rogue sheep or the next grumpy angel.  It isn't a true Christmas nativity play without them.

Grumpy Angel - 2015

She stood where she was supposed to stand.
Then she SAT DOWN and was swinging
her feet.  Definitely our favorite part of this
year's nativity play!

Be Polite To The Dust Bunnies - They Live Here

Dear Zoo,

I know that you currently feel unloved and unappreciated considering your current state of dishevelment.  Please know that it is not that I don't care for you.  I just have had to choose between upkeep and Heathens.  Unfortunately for you, the Heathens have won.

The semester is almost at an end and I will have a chance to get you "caught up" and clean.  Discarded objects will no longer clutter every horizontal surface.  Dishes will no longer be stacked on the counter.  Floors will be vacuumed and shelves will be dusted.  Laundry will be gathered up and the floor will no longer be home to randomly discarded socks and shoes.

Belongings will get tidied up and put back in their places.  Papers will be organized and filed away or discarded - not placed in stacks to be dealt with "later."

Until then, please bear with me, Zoo.  I do love you - you house my Heathens so well and give us a safe place to call HOME.  But this semester has been a rough one.  I'll admit to hardly keeping my head above water on many days.

I know you understand my need to choose the Heathens first.  With the oldest Heathen so close to leaving, that need is even greater because I can see the change growing closer.

Zoo, your time to shine will come soon enough.  Until then, please be polite to the dust bunnies. (I hear they can be rather friendly.)

Love Always,
The Zookeeper

The Road Less Travelled - But An Excellent Road

It happens every fall on Facebook.  The pictures of college acceptance letters start to pop up with increasing frequency along with pictures of ecstatic parents and high school seniors.  "She got accepted to her first choice!  We couldn't be more proud!"  The excitement is palpable.  And I grin every time I see such a post as I remember getting my own acceptance letter.

And, yet, when these same parents talk to my oldest Heathen, they attempt to TALK HIM OUT of his choice.  "Have you thought of college?  You should think about going to college instead."  And Heathen #1, understandably, comes homes irritated and sometimes downright angry.  He knows that he has made the best choice for HIM.  And he knows he has our full support.

It is with GREAT PRIDE that I announce Heathen #1 has chosen to continue to lead a life of service following high school graduation.  He has chosen to join the US Navy and currently has a ship date of August 2, 2016.

The Asst. Zookeeper and I FULLY SUPPORT his choice for his future.  Not only is it an excellent choice for him, but both of our families are NAVY families (with the random person in a different branch occasionally).  We've raised our Heathens to serve and help others - how could we not support his choice?

And for the parents that have felt the need to ask me, "Are you okay with this?"  My answer is: it really isn't MY choice.  I can be a supportive Zookeeper and sign the delayed entry program papers (which I did).  Or, my Heathen can turn 18 in March and sign himself - and leave wondering if his parents support his choice, if he made a good choice.  No Heathen deserves to leave home with extra feelings of self doubt.  Leaving home is momentous enough.

So, to the adults who feel the need to "poo-poo" my Heathen's choice of a future: mind your own business.  You won't hear me ask YOUR child if they are ready for their students loans that will take them the next 30 years to pay off and aren't they worried that they won't find a job with that choice of major?  You will hear me CONGRATULATE your child on their choice of a future that fits THEM.

Have the decency to give my Heathen the same courtesy, please.

Well done, Heathen.  The Asst. Zookeeper and I are VERY PROUD of your choice in a future.

Together When Separate

My Asst. Zookeeper is an amazing man - mostly because he lives with and deals with ME on a daily basis.  For twenty years now, he has been my solid ground through the winds of life.

He is not a fussy, emotional man.  He is "fuzzier" with me than he is with any other human on Earth - including our Heathens now that they are older.  He is definitely a no-nonsense type of person.  He dislikes drama vehemently.

In so many things, he is my polar opposite.  But it works for us.

Last week, on one of my commutes to work, I remember thinking of something funny and also thinking that I had to remember to share that thought with the Asst. Zookeeper since it was something I knew he would appreciate.  This led me to the thought:

Does the Asst. Zookeeper think of me during the day while he is away?  I think of him frequently when things strike me as funny, or ironic.  I think of him as I watch other people deal with life and I consider how he would have dealt with a particular situation.

And I decided that he probably thinks of me in the same manner.  After 20 years together, we function not only as individuals, but as a single unit.  We still love nothing more than to sit and talk, sharing our day.

Turns out I was wrong.

Today, at approximately 9:30 am, my phone rang with the Asst. Zookeeper on the other end of the line.  He had called simply to tell me about the rainbow he saw on his drive to work.  He said he knew what was at the end of the rainbow because it sprang right out of the mountain on one side of the road and went over the roadway.  He had driven under the rainbow.  It was SO AMAZING that he wanted to show it to me because he knew I would love it.  He pulled to the side of the road and tried taking several pictures with his phone but they just didn't show how awesome it really was.

So he called to tell me all about it.  And it was the greatest five minutes of my morning.  Something that I will never forget.

He may be rough and rugged.  He may not be "cuddly" very often.  But I am in his thoughts, even when we are separate.  Nothing is better than that.

When the Calm is FRIGHTENING

The school year is in full swing here at the Zoo - activities are underway, the Heathens are drowning in homework, and I have to sign at least one paper and provide at least one Heathen with money on a daily basis.  Today, I signed a math test and money was requested for a field trip.  All is well.

The Zoo functions at optimal levels when the level of "insanity" is directly proportional to the "lack of time available."  The Asst. Zookeeper and I have always been this way - and the Heathens have learned it as well.

This is typically an asset to the lifestyle we lead.  For example, prior to the beginning of my typing, our day went as follows:

by 6 am - alarms start blaring in various rooms of the house

by 6:30 am - dogs have given up patiently waiting for people to wake up and have begun to get obnoxious in their want of the outdoors

by 6:33am - dogs start cycling through the backdoor and patiently wait as I walk to the bottom of the stairs to start hollering for Heathens to get out of bed

by 7 am - Two Heathens are prepped for school and putting on their shoes (I actually have a 7 am alarm set so that we don't lose track of time in the mornings!); 3 dogs have gone outside; I have consumed at least one cup of coffee (sometimes 2); dishes from breakfast have been washed (if I'm feeling up to it)

between 7 & 7:30 am - I holler up the stairs for the oldest Heathen a minimum of 3 times for him to get moving; I start computer work for the day (either lesson plans or household stuff or volunteer items).

7:30 am - the oldest Heathen finally leaves, and the Asst. Zookeeper starts to get ready for his day;  I'm still working in the dining room, where I remain until 9:30 am

9:30 am - I prep dinner and throw it all in the crock pot as I KNOW the evening is busy.  By 10 am, I'm in the shower.  By 10:45, I'm ready to leave, having made an errand list to attempt during the day.

11 am through 3:30 pm - involves a 45 minute commute to work and teaching 2 college courses, followed by running a few errands and the matching commute home

3:30 pm - as I pull in the driveway, the younger Heathens are getting off the bus;  I enter the Zoo to discover that the oldest Heathen did indeed put water on the stove to boil (per my text).

4 pm - all Heathens are eating dinner prior to evening activities (including scouts and a committee meeting);  At 4:15, I took a scheduled phone call from the college. Everyone is finished eating by 4:45.

Here is where today became FRIGHTENING - from 4:45 pm to 6:30 pm, NOTHING has happened or is scheduled to happen.  Strangely, no one had homework.  I already had prepped everything needed for my meeting tonight.

And, while there were things I COULD DO, there has been nothing I HAD TO DO.  I've paced through the house several times now with the feeling that I am forgetting something important.  I will discover it any moment now and then life will be back onto its normal break-neck pace.

But until then, I'm just not sure how to handle this!

The Last "First" Day

Senior Year for Heathen #1 - need I say more?  He started a count down to graduation at his 17th birthday in MARCH.  He's not excited in the least.

So my Heathen #1 is a senior.  And if one more person asks me if I am upset that he is a senior and will be leaving soon, I may just HIT them!

What does it mean that my oldest Heathen is a senior?
1.  I survived the years of sleeplessness that goes with having a young child in the house where you wake up at every little creak and lie awake waiting to see if you are needed.
2.  I learned to change diapers until he mastered potty training. It was a fierce battle, but I finally proved to be more stubborn then him.
3.  I survived his elementary school years  - where a stubborn, outspoken little boy doesn't always fit in very well.
4.  I watched him attempt to make friends and succeed.  I watched him attempt to make friends and fail.
5.  I've watched him learn that failure is not the end of the process - that it is always worth another try.
6.  I struggled watching him through the middle school years which are painful for even the luckiest of children.
7.  I watched him discover who he is, and accept that who he is, is a pretty cool guy.
8.  I've watched him grow by inches and learned to look up to him - both literally and figuratively.  Although still a teenager, he has strong common sense.
9.  I've watched his independence grow and learned that my opinion is not always welcome, of even needed.  I've also learned that when he asks my opinion, it is because he still seeks guidance.

And the most important:
10.  I've learned that being sad that my Heathen is a senior would be contradictory to everything I've attempted to teach him over the years he has been part of my life.

He doesn't belong to ME.  He belongs to himself.  He should face new adventures with enthusiasm - and everything can be considered an adventure, even a trip to the grocery store.  He has to be able to make decisions that HE can live with and that will allow him to sleep soundly at the end of the day. Doing something on your own is respectable, but ask for help when you need it.

So, NO - I refuse to be sad that my oldest Heathen is a senior.  He has a great future ahead of him and I am excited to see what paths he chooses along the way.  On the first day of kindergarten, I told him that school was a grand adventure and he was finally old enough to start that adventure.  His adventure is not ending, it is still only just beginning...

Heathen #1 - first day of school: SENIOR
August 26, 2015
 

Not only did a get a hug and kiss goodbye, he smiled for
the first day photos.  It has been several years since that happened!