Living With His Mistress

I lead a difficult life - I'm constantly tripping over my husband's mistress.  I started their relationship referring to her as his "girlfriend."  At this point, I've upgraded her to a mistress.  When I speak to her directly, I've called her, "Hey, B****" for years now.  We have a loving relationship - as long my the Asst. Zookeeper is not home.

She has developed a new trick - just in the past two weeks.  The Asst. Zookeeper's new job requires more travel that in the past.  This leaves his mistress home with me.  I care for her as I do the Heathens - she is fed, has proper medical care, etc., all during his absence.  She loves me when he is not at home.  As soon as he walks in the door, I cease to exist.

Her new trick is that she only turns back the bed on HIS side.

Whether the Asst. Zookeeper is home or not, I flip the covers back over the bed in the morning - I wouldn't call it "making the bed" as much as a "you can NOT take a nap" deterrent.  Since he started to travel more for work, she does this EVERY DAY, even on days that he is home.

When I walked into the bedroom a few minutes ago, I found the above scene.  Once she glanced over her shoulder to discover that I was NOT HIM, she immediately went back to looking out the window and ignoring my existence.

NINE YEARS I have lived with this female.  At her current age of 12, I'm sure we are on the downward side of our relationship.  She can no longer go for runs with me (although she wants to and I have to sneak out the door with the other dogs).  But she still manages this type of nonsense - making sure that I know which of us she prefers above all others.  Well done, Duchess.